#Stuff like that. More differing personality stuff
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So there is a lot of bad stuff going on right now, and I'm sure there are lots of people feeling hopeless and thinking of suicide. Well, I've been suicidal for 21 years and I have a few practical pieces of advice for surviving that I rarely see in other places but I think have done more to keep me off the ledge than almost anything.
1. Don't feel guilty for wanting to kill yourself. Life can be extremely painful, and you are not weak, a coward, or irrational for considering the obvious way to alleviate that pain. Guilt on top of the rest of your pain will not help, and you are not a bad person. You are going to have to tell yourself this a lot.
2. If you think you might do it, find an excuse to live. This is different from a reason to live in that it is short term and shallow. For years my excuse was that I still had enough money to buy a pizza and I'd be damned if I didn't get my last pizza before I died, and if i still wanted to kill myself after the pizza then I had lost nothing. I swear this kept me alive through some of the hardest years of my life.
3. If you have an online friend you can trust, ask if they would be willing to do check in duty occasionally on your worst nights. It's very simple, on bad days where hurting yourself is a real possibility, ask your friend if they can send you a message at regular intervals, say 15 or 20 minutes, confirming that you are safe. It can be as simple as "check?", with you responding "I'm ok". Being immediately held accountable makes not doing it so much easier. I asked a friend to help me like this about two weeks ago to deal with a really bad self harm day and the difference between trying to do it on your own and simple check ins is astounding. It hurts so much less.
4. You die with nothing left on the table. This is for when it's over and you are going to kill yourself. You have a plan, you are ready, and you want to. At this point you are effectively dead. Which means there are no consequences. You can finally do the thing that you were always too scared to do. Maybe it's quitting your job, or confessing to your crush. For me it was coming out as trans. This is your last ditch effort, so if it blows up in your face and ruins everything it is no loss because your plan will still work tomorrow. You were already dead anyway, who cares if you left behind a bit more chaos.
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you could argue that we did this sort of, it's a little more complicated.
You see, the reason we maintain our beard and shave it in specific ways is because transformer women often have helms that fill their face in similar ways at the cheeks or with chin armor. That helped the person who has been with this body the whole time fully absolve of herself of any dysphoria by being able to connect her facial her euphorically to a collective gender identity of womanhood of giant metal transforming robots from space since knowledge of the fact there are a lot of intersex human cis women who have facial hair (and intersex people are as common as redheads) wasn't cutting it for xem (hah). we dysphorically regret having to shave our beard recently to fly across the country out of fear of landing somewhere in an emergency where we'd be arrested for 'doing drag' at a public facility.
The reason we say this isn't simply butch per se for us specifically (a human singleton is another matter) is because there isn't an oppositional dynamic between male and female to us. they completely overlap, there's just collective gender assemblage tendencies of components being put together and identified differently (some of our writing mixing alien robot trans material-aesthetic assemblage mixed with gender tackles this, the one that does so most directly so far is our One fanfic. there will eventually be original fiction), the term we use for in our sparktion/hearth/etc. assemblage model that most closely approximates butch is torque, but it is rather different in meaning since it's primarily concerned with the (clash of) momentum literally and metaphorically and not with being masculine (xenogender stuff is fun!). It's also not confined to a physical expression appearance, so helm shapes don't necessarily fit this, and there's no single umbrella for what torque looks like. it's all assemblage, which is very different from the real problem of butch erasure in 21st century human storytelling and history
In addition we've also built up musculature precisely because it is no longer dysphoric anymore to breathe meditatively / heavily when exercising since the chest feels more like how it should, because xey always loved and wanted to emulate the warrior gal vibe (we know this applies much more widely, too, but thought it was worth mentioning), and ultimately that our nervous system now feels so much better exerting strength with HRT than before. but how we dress we think doesn't normally quite fit butch and we recoil at the thought of being more heavily clothed or armored meaning we're perceived as more masculine. the oppositional gender human patriarchy dichotomy is painful to us, we're glad this is changing with a) people understanding how curvy and rounded a lot of armor historically is especially plate, and b) women in armor where sexualization need not mean sacrificing actual armor capacity is becoming more normalized
TLDR you absolutely can be a transfem butch lesbian and we absolutely ended up on a similar but very different route of being torquey zoomdare transfem (taganite) mutualists who will for convenience's sake communicating with other people we share this lovely blue marble with use the terms t4t, sapphic, lesbian, and sometimes butch if we think we have to explain why our gender isn't 'simple' (eugh we hate how reductive that is of binary trans women) but don't think we can get away with explaining xenogender stuff and plurality. unless we are fortunate enough to, I don't know, see our terminology take off or even better that this happens alongside other assemblage models with a growth of a worldwide curiousity and capacity to accept that no one will ever know everything there is to know about gender and orientation so nobody assumes anything of us, takes what we have to say for what it is, asks questions if interested in knowing and knowing us that way, and celebrates what we have in common and what differences we have <3
Is transitioning from male to female to become a butch lesbian a reasonable option?
it is beyond reasonable, it is one of the coolest things you can do on this bitch of an earth
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Mob Movember
Mob Boss Nico x reader
A/n: just a little something inspired by the diva pictured above x
~~~~~~~
“So that’s like gonna be a thing now?”
Nico’s eyebrows pinch together, eyes finding yours in the bathroom mirror and he pauses, razor half way to his face and warm water running from the faucet.
“What do you mean?”
You shrug and he blinks, looking back at his reflection and biting his bottom lip to pull it taut. Then he’s dragging his razor over a smear of shaving cream on his chin, dipping the razor back into the sink to rinse it.
“You shaved a lot this week,” you decide to say, “and yet you always skip the space above your lip.”
Nico bristles at that, a petulant pout glaring at you through the mirror and you try not to laugh at him after indirectly insulting his mustache. It’s not that you hate it per se, it just looks different on him. He’s still cute, you’ll give him that. It’s impossible for him to ever not be attractive, but the mustache doesn’t have the same sexy appeal his beard does.
“Didn’t know I had to explain the concept of a mustache to you.”
“Ouch,” you hold a hand over your heart. “Mean and mustache-y.”
A sigh of annoyance huffs out of his nose, and he shakes his head just once before going back to cleaning up his jawline. “Go away,” he says, but you linger a minute longer to watch him finish shaving, eyes following the bend of his waist when he leans over to rinse off any left over bits of shaving cream.
Giving yourself a moment to appreciate his ass in those light blue jeans he wears all the time, you wonder off before he can look back in the mirror and still see you there.
~~~~
“Not you too!”
Timo frowns, looking around curiously as he slides into the passenger seat. He’s wearing an overly thick puffy coat and those stupid 5 inch inseam shorts from Lululemon that all the boys except Nico wear (much to your dismay) and you were gonna tease him about whether he’s hot or cold but the sight of his face has changed your plans.
“What?” He closed the door, immediately warming his hands in front of the vents.
“Is there like a mustache epidemic going around? What is wrong with you and Nico?”
You saw Timo yesterday, and while he had more stubble than he usually does, you didn’t think he’d be shaving it off into a mustache too. It’s been three long days of trying to get Nico’s new look to grow on you and no matter how times you kiss him, feel the scratch of his freshly shaved cheeks, it’s still not the same. You don’t like the way it tickles your upper lip but not your chin, and you don’t really like the way that you can’t kiss his nose anymore without feeling it.
But you’re trying and it’s hard. Even harder now that your bestie has apparently jumped on the train too.
“You don’t like them?” He asks, not offended but curious. You side eye him, pulling away from the curb and making your way towards the yoga studio.
“Is that why Nico is pouting?” He laughs, clicking his seatbelt. He rubs at his lame excuse of a mustache and you mentally give Nico credit for that. At least he can actually grow a really nice one, not that you’re going to say that to Timo.
“He’s pouting?”
“Uh yeah,” he scoffs, “he’s moped every day this week, Sieges said they’ve been having to talk to clients and stuff because he gets moody right away.”
You cringe, feeling a little bad about the whole thing. You didn’t mean to make Nico feel bad or like you don’t like his mustache. Yeah you don’t love it, but he’s Nico -your Nico -and everything about him is always so beautiful.
“I may be struggling to enjoy it,” you explain hesitantly, “I just am not used to it and he’s never been a mustache guy. Maybe like a day or two but he always shaves.”
“Oof,” Timo laughs, “yeah you probably hurt his feelings. Literally his biggest flex is that you think he’s so pretty.”
Groaning painfully, you thump your head against the steering wheel before pouting up at the red light. You’ve always Nico to be a sensitive person, not in a bad way or anything. He’s just never hid or pushed down feelings when it came to you, and it physically makes you ache to think that your reaction to his new facial hair made him so insecure he didn’t want to tell you.
You’ve got some major Nico loving to make up for.
~~~~
Nico is sat in the Devils booth of The Rock, hunched over the scheduling iPad as the boys mill around the bar. Jesper and Jonas are actually working it looks like, Jonas holding a ladder that has the smaller of the two men perched at the top, Jesper screwing in a new security camera. He’s got Mercer and Alex stocking the bar, and you almost laugh at the overly straight and organized bottles on Mercer’s side compared to haphazardly placed ones on Alex’s.
The Hughes boys are doing something they’re probably not suppose to be doing on the upper level, no where to be seen but definitely heard.
Timo parts from you to go join Jesper and Jonas, who look like they could use it by the way Jesper is trembling on the top rung.
You approach the booth, setting the lunch you brought for Nico onto the table alongside your greens smoothie. He looks up at you when you drop your jacket into the seat, eyes following your movement when you slide in next to him.
“Hey,” he mumbles, and something melancholy settles in the air. A bittersweet smile tugs at your lips, your heart throbbing when you take in the dejected look in his big brown eyes and the way he’s pouting.
“Hi,” you greet, reaching up brush his hair away from his face. Then you hold his cheek, brushing your thumb over the scar on his cheekbone. “I brought you lunch.”
He doesn’t bother to look interested. “Thanks baby.”
“I like your mustache,” you say quietly, tenderly pressing your thumb into the hinge of his jaw where you know he gets headaches from clenching. Like its second nature he relaxes, melting into the feeling.
“No you don’t,” he insists, licking at his pouting lips. “S’fine-“
“I do, I do like it Nico. It’s just different and I was teasing because I’m not used to it.”
Nico blinks, fluttering those stupidly pretty eyelashes at you and then two dimples sink into his cheeks. “Yeah?”
Giggling, you cup the back of his head and draw him closer to you. “You know you’re always handsome, no matter what.” You kiss him before he can say anything else, smiling when his hair scratches at your cheeks and lip.
Nico hums, reaching around to grip your hip and pull you until you’re half sitting in his lap. Then he melts back into the booth, sighing contently.
“Would you two get a room, Jesus fuck.”
You peck Nico’s lips one more time for good measure before pulling back, curling into his side and he slips his arm around you.
Nico reaches for his food, and you bite your lip to keep from laughing. The Hughes brothers have made their way down the stairs, and Mercer and Alex have abandoned the bar in favor of crowding around you and Nico.
Which in itself is a little scary, but add the thin and scraggly mustaches they all have is even worse. Desperate for a distraction, you scramble to grab your juice and take a sip, casting a glance over at Nico who’s smirking proudly. He shares a knowing look with you.
“Why are you making that face?”
You look at Jack, forcing yourself to only look in his eyes as you clear your throat. “What face?”
He points an accusing finger at you. “That face, why are you laughing?”
“M’not.”
“You are, Holtz tell her she is.”
Alex looks around helplessly and you do giggle when you realize his poor mustache is nothing but peach fuzz. “Ok now she’s laughing.”
Steadying yourself, you force your smile down. “I love this new look you all have going on.”
Almost immediately they all groan, offended and outraged and you can’t even listen to them. Hunching over into Nico’s shoulder you cackle, tears springing up in your eyes and stomach aching.
You can feel him chuckle, one hand rubbing at your back to calm you down. Finally you peel yourself off of him, wiping at your wet eyes as the boys glare at you.
“Don’t be mean, it’s for a good cause.” Mercer defends.
“What cause?”
“Movember,” Jack states proudly, “it was Nico’s idea. Good cause and we all bond over our shared ‘staches.” He strokes over his lame excuse of a mustache and Luke cringes, cheeks tinting pink.
You look to Nico. “This was your doing?”
He looks utterly pleased with himself, shrugging nonchalantly but there’s a twinkle of mischief in his features. The sight makes you giddy. What has he been up to?
The other three boys wonder up behind the rest, and you cackle again at the blonde patch of hair on Jesper’s lip and the razor burn on Jonas’s chin. Offended, they frown at you.
“S’like our new tradition,” Jesper says but it sounds more like a question as he examines Nico.
Your boyfriend beams at you. “Like last year we did no nut November,” he explains, and you roll your eyes. You hated that stupid challenge between them, and if you recall correctly, they all did too.
“Yeah and you lost,” Timo mocks, glancing at you because you know all too well why Nico lost. And Nico knows too because you can’t for the life of you keep a secret from him.
“Hey you all cried to y/n to make me lose,” Nico argues, and Timo’s mouth drops open.
“Traitor!” Jesper gasps, pointing at you. “You weren’t supposed to tell him we came to you.”
“Hey the only loyalty I have is to him,” you jab your thumb in Nico’s direction. “And his dick.”
Nico’s smirk grows, shuffling in his seat as he accepts the compliment from you. “You all went crying to her about how dry November was making me mean. And that’s why I lost.”
“Should’ve known to never trust a temptress,” Jack mutters, glaring at you. Offended, you glare back.
“Well you can’t a grow a mustache,” you hiss, “in fact none of you can. That dirt smear on your lip looks like it took twenty years to grow Jack.”
He clutches his heart, offended and looks to Nico for help. Nico takes a sip of your smoothie, gesturing for them to leave. “M’on her side. Get back to work, all of you.”
They grumble, stalking away from the table and muttering to each other as they return to their assigned jobs for the day. Shuffling, you turn to Nico.
“You’re so mean for letting them walk around like that.” You giggle quietly, and Nico snickers.
“You should see the update selfies they’ve been taking,” he whispers, pleased with himself. “Think I’ll make a collage of them and hang them in the office before I tell them it was all a joke.”
“Why didn’t you tell me this was to get back at them for last year?”
He shrugs. “You were so fucking good to me after they whined last year that I wanted it to be a surprise. And was it a good one, or what?”
You laugh again, flashing back to seeing them all standing around you earlier, so proud of their matching mustaches.
“It’s kind of cute,” you mumble thoughtfully, laying your head on his shoulder. “They all wanted to be like you.”
Nico hums in agreement. Then he’s sliding the iPad to you. “Look this over, yeah? Make sure I’ve got the schedule and times right for Thanksgiving.”
He’s so sweet, you think, looking over the calendar he’s filled in. Even when he’s fucking around and embarassing the boys, he’s given them slack for almost the whole month. And he’s even written in the day off for Friday after Thanksgiving. Instead a big red heart is drawn on the day and in his perfectly slanted handwriting is written “Family Sleepover”.
“Looks good,” you agree, pressing a kiss to his jaw. “But the mustaches have to go by Thanksgiving. I am not having those in any photos.”
“Yes ma’am.”
#mob boss nico hischier#nico hischier#him and i chats#him and I blurb#new jersey devils#him and i#nico hischer x reader
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Found-Family headcanons for a³'s coven of chaos, part 1: (because they all deserved more time with each other)
(part 2, here.)
(part 3, here.)
Agatha learned spanish for Rio, obviously—and spices up her dialogue with Spanish phrases out of habit. I assume she also knows other languages, being alive for as long as she has.
But I'd also like to think that language-learning gradually becomes something they all surprise each other with. And this is definitely super self-indulgent, because I'm always ecstatic when my native English-speaker friends are interested in learning my language.
For example, I definitely think Billy would ask Alice to teach him korean—and she'd be really excited for that. Not to mention, I feel like Billy just has the vibe of someone who'd be interested in learning different languages. (and korean in particular I think he'd definitely find interesting.)
I also definitely think Jen would try learning Sicilian for Lilia, considering the effort she makes to understand her and keep her comfortable towards the end. Lilia would be so moved, because she probably hasn't spoken to anyone in her mother-tongue in centuries. Like, it's literally considered an endanged language. (“Currently considered a “vulnerable” language by UNESCO, Sicilian faces increasing pressure from standard Italian, though it remains stronger than nearly all other Italian language varieties.”)
Mrs. Davis loves making food for all of them, always trying to diversify her cooking to suit their appetites, their cultures, the things each of them can eat, etc. It's a lot, but she doesn't mind!! She's a grandma!! She loves feeding people—and she missed having someone to cook for.
She grows her greens all by herself, too. Rio occasionally helps her with weeding and stuff. Mrs. Davis is freaked out by her rancid vibes at first, but ends up saying she's a “very sweet girl,” to which everyone responds by staring at her horrified.
Mrs. Davis would also definitely make a chore chart for everyone, but it never works out for a NUMBER of reasons.
First or all, Agatha always skips her turn with cleaning, saying that “she forgot.” She knows that either Billy or Sharon will just take care of it anyways. (Jen refuses to do any of Agatha's chores. “She can either do it by herself or drown in her own garbage-”)
Lilia always gets distracted and leaves her chores unfinished. She can only ever remember laundry, for some reason—she does everyone's laundry. But other than that, jeez. My girl is messy and that's okay. She has her very own unique way of finding where she puts her stuff, but others would merely call it chaos. Jen always picks up after her—and Lilia always huffs and puffs about how, “well now I can't find anything!”
Alice is the sort of person who accidentally creates messes everywhere, then stuffs everything wherever she finds. In drawers, under beds, you name it. Very, “out of sight, out of mind.” Like, she probably has “a chair” where she throws all her clothes.
Billy is very responsible, always abiding to the chore chart and oftentimes doing Agatha's chores too.
Jen is a total neat freak. She wants everything to be organised and under control—and she needs everything to smell nice.
She always makes the others scented candles. Agatha claims they're “useless garbage,” but uses them anyways.
Jen is also the one who usually keeps track of the bills and expenses, since she earns the most through her, “real job.”
Lilia is the sort of person to get lost in the mall, or even just the super-market. Alice has needed to look for her more than once.
Agatha loves crushing Jen's videos by appearing in the background and doing whatever bullshit she feels like.
Alice and Billy are everyone's mediators. Whenever someone gets in an argument, they're the ones who force them to work it out.
Alice is very protective of Sharon and Lilia, because she has mommy issues. Agatha has the opposite sort of mommy issues—but Sharon and Lilia treat them both like they're their kids.
The first time Billy brought Eddie to meet his coven, they literally put him through trials to decide whether he's worthy to date their son. Eddie is surprised he's been coven-approved.
“These women are insane, Billy—but then again, so am I for sticking around anyways.”
Eddie is very tired. His favourite coven members are Jen and Alice, who he considers the most normal. I REALLY think he'd fuck with Jen, because they're both so done with everyone else.
#agatha all along#agatha harkness#rio vidal#agathario#jennifer kale#lilia calderu#billy maximoff#alice wu gulliver#sharon davis#agatha x rio#agatha all along headcanons#headcanons
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Look shit is going to get bad. It's always going to get bad. But with that it means it'll get better too. What's good and bad is different for everyone. Many things that are bad for you know might stay that way. But many of them will also progress and change and actually get better. Beyond that thought, if you stay and you fight, you will get better. Maybe it is your family that'll always be crazy, maybe the political world will be beyond bleak for the foreseeable future, but if you stay you'll be able to see the things that will improve and will be good. I know so many of us have so much on our plates right now and the results of yesterday and dreadful. But please stay. I promise it'll be worth it.
Sure everything you hope for might not happen but you'll never get to know the things that WILL if you stay. I know the point of this post is mostly to address the dread many of us feel after the election. And I fully get it trust me I do. But as someone who has made that choice before and I am so grateful it didn't work for me to be able to still be here I want to share a few things.
"it gets better" is both right and wrong in my opinion. Yes sometimes the things that have you down so bad that you walk that path can absolutely get better. Sometimes they don't though and while that sucks it's okay. Because as I said before, YOU get better. (Not to run into "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger" stuff because I get it, why do we have to be strong) You grow, you learn, you change. And with that growth and change your state of mind often changes too. Admittedly my life isn't too different from when I reached that point, but it's also so much better in so many ways. I'll use my family for an example. My family is so chaotic it's overwhelming and that hasn't changed, what has changed though is my ability to cope with it. I am still the one everyone runs to to fix problems. I still try to fix those problems more than I probably should, but I have started to learn to say no and to put up boundaries with them. So while yes it hasn't changed for the most part the growth I've had within myself has allowed me some space from all the chaos and it's truly helped me.
Then there's things like medication and therapy that's has helped immensely along the way. And I fully understand that not everyone has the same access to things I have been lucky enough to have along the way as the journey is different for everyone. And especially given the outcome of yesterday those things may become even harder to obtain for others. But I will say I also thought a lot of those things were out of my reach and I started asking the right questions and made it a little father (again this won't be true for everyone but hopefully will be able to at least a few)
I reached a standstill with progressing in my career because I didn't know what to do next. One day I got super lucky and met a new person who gave me so much guidance (more than I think they know) and it reignited my passion for my goals (again I know I am super lucky to find myself in that situation). My point with that is we have to be able to reach each other because you never know who you can help (with something that may be simple to you) and who can help you. You don't get to experience that if you're gone.
I'm not trying to get into my whole story or journey but I'm trying to share enough that it makes sense and is understood when I say I know what it feels like to be that low and I know what it feels like to overcome it. So please trust me on that.
I know things are scary right now. So much is uncertain and on the line. But you won't fix it by overly stressing about it and you won't fix anything is you don't stay. Times are going to get challenging and it's going to get hard and rough, but we will always be able to do something about it, especially together. So I can't help you if I leave and you can't help me if you go.
So take some time to process you frustration, your grief, and your fears. Then when you're ready take a deep breath and be prepared. Be prepared to take action. Figure out what is most important to you that you fear will change with the coming times. It could be your number 1 thing it could be a top 3-10 depending on what you have the energy for. And. Then start to learn. What can you do to help, what can you do to make a change, how can you make a difference. Then make a plan. When we all taken action things will start to be okay again.
But we can't inform each other if we're not here. We can't help if we're not here. Like OP said times have been bad before throughout history and humans have survived and we'll survive this. If you need a reminder and it won't mess you up too much look into the things people have preserved through (try not to focus too much on those tragically lost to those times because that won't help in this situation)
I know this is long and has gone all over the place but I needed to get this out because it's just part of everything swirling in my mind lately. So, sorry is it's a little hard to understand my points, if you'd like to reach out to discuss any of it with me if gladly try to be more clear on some of it I just was trying to not fully take over OP's post with my response (which I know I more than likely have by now, SORRY OP) this post just resonated with me and everything started flowing. So please just stay even if it means me typing all of this out was worth it and because you are worth it and we will work together to make it better
I hope none of you disappear in the coming days. Seriously don't do anything that can't be undone.
#truly am sorry op#and for how long and rambly it is#i just needed a place to say it and your post just happed to be the place to do so
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the original post i want everyone to see is way out of my hands now, so i’ll repost this again here as new but separate post. it touches on things i want to go into more depth about.
@wasabikitcat gets this idea. this reply—thank you so much for not just understanding what i was going for, but putting my exact thoughts into cleaner words on the bad reading comprehension site.
i can't believe how misunderstood my point was about “spirituality” (i didn’t know it was that much of a loaded phrase!), but thank you for putting what i meant into more nuanced terms.
it's something that can be hard for me to put into words, and maybe i gave people the wrong impression by using the word "spirituality", since words mean different things to different people. i just haven't seen people discussing it so i wasn't sure how to really put it. but regardless of terminology, this reply is exactly what i'm getting at. and this is coming from someone who has a very scientific mind. i wouldnt even consider myself a traditionally “spiritual” person in the normal connotation of the word.
edit: this one as well!
i see this as a cultural/political factor that we shouldn’t ignore, because this sense of meaning has driven people's motivations since the beginning of human civilization.
there's a primal aspect that hasn't really left us but there seems to be no room for it in our modern culture because half of these “guides” seem to be driven by “i cant wait for civilization to collapse so MY ideology can rise from the ashes" and the other half of it seems to be driven by greed. and often they are hand in hand.
i would really like to see actual enlightening ideas stemming from buddhist thought, analytical psychology, collective unconscious, and archetypes to take off in the public consciousness. (completely divorced from jordan peterson. just the original jungian stuff)
i am especially supportive towards getting people interested in carl jung's works. his idea was to get people to understand, "what myth am i living?" based on the same archetypes and symbols that recur time and time again throughout human history that we can all collectively recognize regardless of culture. so it's a sense of meaning based in the self. i don't want people being sent down reactionary paths when looking for meaning in their lives.
i think it would benefit people to who feel lost especially in uncertain/unprecedented times like, with those “there's got to be more to this, something deeper,” insinct. i see that people are looking for this but get taken advantage of or manipulated.
but on this deeper sense of meaning in life thing, the Left isn't doing a great job at providing an option for “lost” people looking for meaning that the Right seems to be having no trouble with. i wonder if this is why we've seen so many of these lost young men flock to reactionary commentators?
this reminds me of an excellent point contrapoints made in her video about jordan peterson, saying,
“The last thing I like is that you talk about deep shit. I was watching a video where you and a couple of zany goons were talking about Plato and Aristotle and the meaning of life. And I thought, ‘Huh… on the Left, we don’t really talk about that kind of thing. All we talk about is how society oppresses people.’ And that might not be enough. Because people need to have a positive purpose in life. I mean, personally, I don’t give a shit. I’m pretty happy to sit here watching the same three seasons of Strangers with Candy until I die. But other people, like Dostoevsky, Camus, other white guys who talk about lobsters…they have this need to have purpose in the face of suffering, and like, not just complain about patriarchy. I guess it’s easier to not complain about patriarchy when patriarchy isn’t the thing that’s making you suffer. But I do think that an education that only teaches people about oppression is inadequate. We spend four years teaching undergraduates why capitalism is bad, and then we say, ‘Well, you’re educated now. Good luck getting a job under capitalism, bye!’ …And that really kind of sucks! But you know, I think that’s a point that can probably be made without comparing transgender activism to Stalin.”
speaking of her, this is a related post i wrote earlier on young men being radicalized and how to approach communication
and by the way, if you are interested in learning jungian psychology and want to see what it’s about, here are some resources to get you started:
i think the jung subreddit has a great collection of resources on its about page.
i highly recommend Demystifying Jungian Psychology to start. it’s meant for beginners. it is available in english and spanish. you can currently find the book in the comments section here. since sometimes these links lead to a 404, i don’t want to link directly to the google drive page. i want you to have a link to the original thread in case it gets broken.
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THE PRINCE OF WALES HAS GIVEN AN INTERVIEW AT THE END OF HIS OFFICIAL VISIT TO SOUTH AFRICA.
During the candid and emotional interview he admitted how the past few months had been ‘brutal’ due to the health scares The Princess of Wales and King Charles went through :
‘Honestly? It’s been dreadful. It’s probably been the hardest year in my life. So, trying to get through everything else and keep everything on track has been really difficult. But I’m so proud of my wife, I’m proud of my father, for handling the things that they have done. But from a personal family point of view, it’s been, yeah, it’s been brutal.’
Speaking about the Princess of Wales he said that :
‘She’s doing well. Doing well.’
Speaking about what it meant to host the awards in Africa, a continent he connects very deeply to as he spent time there following his mother's passing and it is the place he proposed to The Princess of Wales as well, he said :
'Hearing the Circle of Life. I don’t know about everyone else, but hearing the Lion King and things like that gets me quite emotional, So, when they started singing and I saw the clips from the top of Table Mountain and we were all there and it’s happened. I did feel quite emotional.'
He then spoke about his children watching the awards saying :
'I don’t know yet. I haven’t clocked in with them yet but I hope they did.'
William added of his relaxed demeanour in Cape Town this week :
'It’s interesting you say that ’cause I couldn’t be less relaxed this year, so it’s very interesting you’re all seeing that. But it’s more a case of just crack on and you’ve got to keep going. I enjoy my work and I enjoy pacing myself and keeping sure I have got time for my family too.'
He also spoke about his family's opinions on his beard :
'Well Charlotte didn’t like it the first time. I got floods of tears the first time I grew a beard, so I had to shave it off. And then I grew it back. I thought, hang on a second and I convinced her it was going to be okay'
He also spoke about his new role as the Prince of Wales and how he intends to 'royal' in a different way than his grandmother and father before him :
‘You mention the added responsibility and the freedom in the same sentence,’ he laughed. It’s a tricky one. Do I like more responsibility? No. Do I like the freedom that I can build something like Earthshot then yes. And that’s the future for me. It’s very important with my role and my platform, that I’m doing something for good. That I’m helping people’s lives and I’m doing something that is genuinely meaningful.’
William spoke about the BTS work that goes into setting up huge events like Earthshot successfully :
‘So, the Earthshot is a culmination if you like of all that put together. But it takes a lot of work, and there’s a lot of unseen stuff that goes on, a lot of meetings, a lot of people coming in, a lot of chatting and phone calls, letters, all trying to sort of make the Earthshot get to being the best possible entity it can be'
He talked about his frustrations over reluctance as well as more involvement from buisness & governments saying :
‘I’d like it to be more a team sport. And so, when you go and approach people...business...or even government...and say, listen, we’re building this incredible thing. Please come on board. Some people are extremely fast and keen to it. Others take a little bit longer and it’s those people who take a little bit longer, I’m like, guys, we just don’t have the time.'
'So, yes, I get a bit frustrated that it takes a long time to convince people that this is worthy of their attention. But I guess that’s the nature of a global environment prize, you start from scratch and it’s going to take a bit of time.'
On his hope for the solutions & the impact and his message to those who can invest, he said :
'So you guys have seen for yourselves the scale of the solutions. I mean, they cover all sectors in all walks of life. Brilliant people, some barely started, some been a bit more established and have a bit more money. But overall all doing fantastic work in the same direction. I think the key thing for us is how do we translate that into more impact, more scale, and ultimately, greater progress in tackling environmental challenges.’
On his hope for more involvement, ‘I definitely think so. We’re giving this amazing platform to all of them. And really it’s an amazing platform for business to come in and poach what they want. But if we keep waiting....we’re going to keep eating into time that we just don’t have. And so my message to business really is: hurry up and be courageous. Invest faster because we just don’t have that time.’
#prince of wales#the prince of wales#prince william#william prince of wales#british royal family#british royals#royalty#brf#royals#royal#british royalty#kate middleton#princess of wales#the princess of wales#princess catherine#catherine princess of wales#about catherine#about the waleses#by william#SA24#Earthshot24#InterviewEarthshotSA24#quotes#8112024#princess charlotte of wales#princess charlotte#king charles iii
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so I had some thoughts on the burnout post but didn't want to hijack it so this is just my own rambling attempt to process the feelings I've been struggling with for two days which obviously not everyone wants to read, thus my putting a read more
I've been crying off and on for the past couple days which is really no surprise, and I've been trying to avoid political news and political posts. In fact, after this I plan to hide the political tags for a while, heavily curate my Reddit experience, and then do I don't even know what with all my new free time
because I don't talk about it a lot here, this is my fandom space, my casual space, and I'll sometimes post about personal stuff but almost never politics, but I am actually very political. 'member of multiple political mailing lists, have marched in many protests, write postcards to swing state voters' political. and I want to talk a little about why this defeat feels different. because this crushed me in a way that 2016 did not.
the thing is. over the past few days I've seen a lot of people talking about how if you didn't realize Trump was going to win, you live in a bubble. and I think to a certain extent that's true. we all have our little echo chambers. but for me, at least, and a lot of the people I know, it wasn't just that. it was this core certainty that Trump would not win, could not win, because surely our country wasn't like that. surely our fellow Americans were not like that. it wasn't about competency or about policy. it was about basic human decency. and that's what I feel like we lost. not an election. but any remaining belief we had that people are basically good.
because it seems they're not. at least not around here. the cold hard fact at the end of the day is that the majority of our country looked at a senile, racist, fascist criminal grifter [eta: how could I forget rapist in that description?] and either actively wanted him to hold the highest office in the land, or just didn't care whether or not he did. they know exactly what he's going to do, and they're fine with it. and that hurts so much that it is nearly unbearable.
how do you move on from that? how do you cope with the fact that there's something so deeply rotten at the core of your fellow man? how do you deal with that? how do you fight back?
I am full of so much grief that I literally don't know where to put it.
so I don't want to fight anymore. I'm tired. I'm nauseated. I'm angry. But most of all, I'm sad. I can't do it right now. and I think that's probably okay. I think in six weeks or six months I'll feel differently. but right now I just can't do it. and I think the most important thing really can be to take a step back and focus on something else. because I know these feelings are not productive. I know that there are still good people out there and there are still things worth fighting for. but right now, all I feel is this aching chasm where my faith in humanity used to be.
so I'm unplugging - not from fandom or tumblr, but from politics and news - for at least a little while. sometimes that's the most important thing to do if you want to still be able to get out of bed in the morning.
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Nightmare and Dream but feral, non-skeletal body!
For the love of god PLEASE click on the image for better quality + close ups and clothed version under the cut!!
Would you kiss them?
Video process:
I made these using a specific context
A while ages ago I drew and posted a drawing of Nightmare and Dream on their light ball form but with some alterations/personal headcanons.
On the post, I expressed my desire to draw the twins in a universe were Nim didn’t need to give them bodies, and just let them grow naturally. And specifically give them an animalistic appearance, instead of a humanoid one like most artist do.
You can see on the process video that it took me 1000 sketches to make something that looked good and I was happy with, the video is obviously sped up, the total time it took me to make this was 28 hours and 15 minutes.
Now explaining some things:
Why are they so big?
I read on a post made by Joku that Nim, before giving them skeleton bodies, tried to make them human ones, but the pure amount of magic and power the twins had made the human bodies explode or some shit. So she picked skeletons since the magic could flow freely through the bones without being confined by muscle and flesh. That made me think if their power had physical forms, it would be gigantic. So I gave them gigantic forms to better represent their status of strength and power, beings made from raw magic to serve as guardians of all emotions throughout the multiverse, of course I needed to make them big and intimidating!
Why the horns?
Artistic design choice, I gave them little horns and a chubby tail in their light ball form to purposefully make them more animalistic, wanted to keep it while making these. Also just giving them a smooth head with nothing much going on looked weird and boring.
Why the draconian look?
Dragons had been created and depicted as symbols of pure power above humanity and worshipped as deities throughout several cultures around the world, different depictions of dragons has been one of the only things present among almost all cultures, like a default folklore creature. While I tried to incorporate other mythical creatures in the design, the draconic body plan felt more right due to the influence of dragons on human beliefs, and their representation as magical and powerful beings beyond human comprehension. Plus I just really love drawing dragons.
Why the clothing choice? Also why is Dream half naked while Nightmare has everything covered?
While designing the clothes for Nightmare, I used as reference clothing that usually royalty would wear, Nightmare has a really big ego and sees himself as a king, so he uses fancy, expensive clothing and jewelry, adapted and designed for his anatomy. Not practical for battle, but his corruption can go through the fabric without damaging it, and most people and monsters just run when they see him, so he doesn’t worry about it getting dirty or tearing, Nightmare just expects every soul to instantly submit when they see him, so he never worries about getting into a battle and getting dirty he has that big of an ego.
Dream is the opposite, his style of clothing much more practical for running, jumping, flying, fighting and general exercise. He has 4 bags in total, 2 on each side, inside them he keeps several items, be it healing food, magical artifacts, first aid kit, gifts he receives, stuff he buys or random things he finds and wants to take home with him. Dream’s crown is now a colar couldn’t figure out how to make it work with the head shape and horns, his cape is from his official design, but changed to white, was planning to make it yellow but when I looked at it my eyes hurt because there was too much yellow everywhere. I made Dream’s clothes with the intent to match his official design, I didn’t to the same for nightmare because a turtle neck with a hoodie on a dragon would make him more huggable than intimidating. Plus I like to think that the leg warmers was a gift from Blue, and the ring on his horn a gift from Ink. Didn’t add more stuff on him because I couldn’t think of something that would look good and match Dream’s vibe, the rest of his clothes on his official design didn’t translate well here. Oh, while I was drawing this, I drew the colar and the leg warmers first, without the cape, Dream looked like a twink with a pet play kink.
Side note; neither Nightmare or Dream see the use of clothes as a necessity or as decency. For them clothes are nothing but pure decoration and to show off status for Nightmare, they can wear full body suits, partial clothing, just jewelry, or nothing at all, which is what they usually go for when at home, wearing or not wearing stuff doesn’t make that much of a difference to them at all.
Do they act as animals or do they have human intelligence?
Despite me using the word “feral” all the time to describe them, they do not actually act as animals. I’m only using “feral” to describe their body/anatomy, Nightmare and Dream are fully sentient and have human level intelligence/awareness. They are capable of speech and have opposable thumbs on their front paws, they can grab, write, hold… do anything a human can do with their hands with dexterity. But they do have to use only hand one at a time, and balance themselves with the other. To use both hands, they have to be sitting, or be supported by something, they can balance themselves on their wings if they have to.
And now contradicting what I just said, they have some animalistic behaviors. The twins can growl, purr and roar. Despite Nightmare being able to use his tentacles and Dream being able to shoot magic arrows out of his wings, they to also scratch and bite while fighting. Since they are big and heavy, they can easily crush bone under their weight and their bite force is strong enough to split someone in half. If you need a reference, just use Smaug from The Hobbit, he has more or less the balance of animal behavior and human intelligence I’m looking for.
Expanding more on this, the twins stretch just like felines, and often sleep in positions usually cats sleep in (they don’t actually need to sleep but do anyway). Dream likes to go fishing, and by fishing I mean jumping in a lake and chasing the fish underwater. He finds it more fun than sitting around and waiting for the fish to come to you instead.
I guess you count their lack of necessity to wear clothes as animal logic too?
_________________
If you have any more questions about them, I will be happy to answer!
And yes, I do plan on making more drawings of Nightmare and Dream on this form!
Dreamtale belongs to @jokublog
Feral concept/design by @yakutarts (me)
#artists on tumblr#art#artwork#drawing#digital art#digital artwork#furryart#design#furry#sfw furry#undertale#dreamtale#undertale multiverse#UTMV#sans#dream sans#nightmare sans#dream#nightmare#underverse#utmv sans#utmv fanart#dreamtale fanart#dream!sans#nightmare!sans#yakut arts#yakutarts#yakut art#Yakut#dragon
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I think that it's now more important than ever to keep making art.
Whether it's some scribbles on a piece of a paper, paint on a canvas, typing out erotic fanfiction about two cephalopod women, i need you to keep going. OKAY?!
Keep going at your own pace. Don't feel like you have to "grind" to achieve success, you're probably young as hell, you don't need to become a masculine obsessed fucking nutjob that is so obsessed with "discipline" and all this bullshit. Sure "discipline" is cool but... That shit takes a LONG TIME to develop and it only comes with experimentation and see what you believe in and what you enjoy. Don't get.... heh...... heh heh..... BRAINWASHED!!! by women hating bald bastards online who wanna turn you into a fun hating robot that's all about "work work work." Fuck them.
You are a human with flesh, blood, bones, a heart and a brain. You are not a machine. Got it?
Anyways, in talks of art, i wanna give my own sort of help for my writer friends out there! I thought it would be fun and plus, there's too many damn writing tips out there that boil down to "you HAVE to do this thing, you HAVE to follow this structure" and i think that is bullshit. Complete and utter bullshit that gives you more stress than needed. You know how many boring mid action movies come out that follow the hero's journey? The three act structure? The story circle? It is better to just make shit and learn what you could do for next time.
There are no rules, all of the "rules of storytelling" are just optional suggestions that you can either take or leave. Plus it seems like every fucking YouTuber has a different set of rules that conflict with each other anyways. However, I wanna share my own sort of "basic ass fundamentals of stories" that can fit into any story structure you want! I got these guidelines from the YouTube channel The Closer Look. I like their content, it's very insightful.
Here's Dr. Spectre's basic ass fundamentals for stories.
Characters. Simple, a story must have characters otherwise you are making something else that is not a story.
Progression. Is there a sense of progression? Does it feel like for every second of story it isn't stagnating or getting dull and boring? Does it feel like shit is happening and growing? If it feels boring to read for you, then it's gonna be boring for another person reading it. Progression could be plot based or character based and them growing as the story goes on. Doesn't matter which one, can be both or one. Good stories never feel like they are staying the same or spinning their wheels.
Delivery (Aka. Setup and payoff). Do you deliver on the promises in the story? And do you deliver them in a way where the audience after they finishing reading or watching, they felt like it was all worthwhile and they didn't waste time consuming your story.
Everything else? IT'S OPTIONAL!!! COMPLETLY OPTIONAL! YOU KNOW HOW MANY STORIES BREAK THE "RULES"?! Do not become reliant and dependent on these "rules" because it'll slow your development and discourage experimentation. Not every story is gonna fucking follow the Save The Cat format.
There is also the talk of theme and i will say this.
Theme is not "this story is about sex, drugs, greed." No. Theme is a message or argument, it is not a word, it is something you are trying to say via a story. People don't have to agree with the theme, but it must make people think about it. If your story is about sex, what is it trying to say about sex? That sex is a scary thing and that it's okay to feel scared and worried about your first time? What are you trying to say about greed? Etc. Etc.
I read through a Sonic comic recently that everyone loves called Scrapnik Island and guess what? I fucking love that comic too.
Scrapnik Island isn't truly about Sonic and Tails getting stuck on an island and Mecha Sonic is there and he becomes evil and does all this stuff. No, what it's ACTUALLY about is that your worth as a person isn't determined by successes and failures, Mecha Sonic feels like he is worthless and is a failure because he not only failed to kill Sonic, but also failed to help his friends on Scrapnik Island. However, Sonic snaps him out of that bullshit mindset and it's truly, truly wonderful stuff.
Splatoon 2: Octo Expansion isn't truly about Agent 8 being trapped in a facility and defeating an evil ai. It talks about racism and what does it talk about specifically? That it doesn't matter what someone looks like, as long as they are a good person that's all that matters. That life is varied and beautiful and it's worth protecting from those who wish to destroy it.
There's a reason why Agent 8 takes the time to soak in the fresh air and sunlight near the end of Octo Expansion, why Eight has memcakes to collect and we see their thoughts and wishes. it's there to explore that theme, that idea of what the story is truly about.
Splatoon as a franchise is about how wonderful creativity itself is, that art and life are connected and grow together and are important and deserved to be protected. Commander Tartar, Mr. Grizz and Overlorder are all opposed to that idea and that's why they are the antagonists. DJ Octavio less so because he is trying to save his own culture and art, even as to go far as manipulating a mentally ill Callie who was already growing distain and tiredness from her own culture, so it just so happens that these two chaotic forces share the same ideology.
Now, I wanna say, do you NEED a theme to make a story? No. BUT! If you don't have something to say and that connective tissue, then it's gonna weaken everything else and the action, plot and characters have to be fucking top notch. The "Rule of Cool" only works when... you know.... it's cool? And well done?
Anyways, I've rambled long enough. Please keep making art, please? Especially now considering what has happened. I need you to hold onto hope, hold onto creativity and fun. You must. You have to...
Be good people.
#splatoon#splatoon 3#story analysis#storytelling#writing#creative writing#writing tips#sonic the hedgehog#sonic comics#inspiration#keep making stuff#pleaseeee#art#creative#creativity#fanfiction#long post#rambles#ramblings#please reblog
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if my silly recaps and my reactions bring a small smile to your face or remind you of a book you love in these trying times, it's all worth it ♥ I'm hugging you softly and telling you I'm here for you ♥
previously, in harrowcita del 9:
this happened
EPIPARODOS
9 months and 29 days before the emperor's murder
I need you all to know I'm reading all of these announcements of time stamps for the emperor's murder like this
I spent these past 2 days marinating on this time stamp and making math in my head with the fact that harrow told palmolive that he's been in his river loft for 8 months
and being like "is this gonna be the Explanation????"
sort of
remember when I said harrow was probably the one who did the mind tampering or, at least, it was done with her consent?
I WAS CORRECT
I also said maybe it had to do with the emperor and his murder but that's not yet been clarified
harrow is asking yandere twin to help her do a brain procedure to forget stuff
for reasons that will be partially disclosed later
basically, it's like if she was asking her to cut her hair for her, but more metal
yandere twin also sort of dunks on palmolive and harrow goes like "you wash your third house filthy mouth before talking about my bestie palmolive sextus like that"
she didn't say that word by word, she said "I may have been Sextus's necromantic superior; but he was the better man. You are not even so worthy of that brain as to wipe its bloodied remnants from the wall."
which is kinda similar in concept
camilla would have high-fived her for that one
yandere twin is trying to convince harrow not to do the brain hair cut because it's dangerous and potentially useless
as if that has ever stopped someone from the ninth from doing crazy shit
harrow tells yandere twin that if she thinks becoming a lyctor doesn't mean they're more trapped than ever, she's delulu
harrow also exhibits one golden eye
and I'm like WAS GIDEON SLURPED IN THE END???? I WAS HOLDING OUT FOR HOPE!!!!
yandere twin says "time to absolutely fuck you up"
cue brain makeover montage with this song
please imagine it with that song, I need you to see my vision
I swear it's very important
I didn't mention it before but this chapter was narrated by yandere twin
sponsored by chad aka babs aka nebarius...was it nebarius or naberius? anyway
she says that harrow's brain makeover is a "destructive, romantic, ridiculous act"
I sure hope so
she also says she's gonna marry harrow, but probably not
I sure hope not, because it's not my ship, yandere twin, I'm sorry
I like you, but not for harrow
ACT FIVE
CHAPTER 40, 41, 42
I'm grouping these all together because they're a ~theme~
the fact that the titles of them are like ?????????? is very much the spirit of these recaps
thank you, author, I see your vision
these are other aus, much like the canaan house gideon-less au, but with different scenarios
first au has a broken IX skull, it takes place in the ninth and harrow is called "nova" instead of "nonagesimus"
in it, she's fighting ortus, or attempting to
because harrow wants ortus to give her the spot of cavalier primary
which is very regina george twin and chad behavior, they had a similar situation going on, but they resolved it with biting
as you do in the third house
(I just wached a yt video in which a person was called 'babs' and they said the name so many times it's starting to make me want to name chad correctly)
(it's fixing my brain)
she also mentions a Reverend Daughter who isn't her
she doesn't seem to like the other reverend daughter, even if she stepped in to intercede for her at one time, and ortus and her argue about it until crux comes in
it's giving gideon and harrow switching spots, in a way, although gideon never wanted to be cavalier primary
neither did ortus
regina george twin is the only one fighting for that spot
she is made to go and apologize to two pilgrims standing there and, when she does, it's abby and magnus from the fifth
and abby says "this isn't how it happens"
our favorite phrase
next au has a V broken skull and takes place in a ball
there is a Divine Highness who is looking for a bride and this is a dance to present suitors to her
the sixth house isn't dancing or joining in on the party, wich is another tick on my personal checklist of my favorite house
idk if there's a quiz of which house you're in but I hope I'm that one
*me getting the second and having to erase my memory like harrow*
abby and magnus show up once again and magnus is eating the food and complimenting harrow on how accurate it is
ortus is with them too, because polycule
they all wanted to see where this au led (actually, me too) but, you know what they say
say it with me:
"this isn't how it happens"
42 is a broken IV skull
this one is, at the start, a sort of military au
the kiddies from the fourth show up, remember them?
they're still talking in whispers among themselves
so cute ♥ I'd say protect them at all costs, but we already failed at that
the important part of this one is that it turns from a military au into a coffee shop au
and there's a BARI star (puns!)
"the arms beneath the rolled-up sleeves betrayed lean, taut muscle, a little dewy with sweat and steam from the mess. But it was the face that sent her neurons in a thalergetic spin. When Harrowhark looked at that face, she found a curious heat travelling all the way up from the pit of her pylorus to the high collar of her Cohort shirt. It then traversed her cheeks, her nose, her brow, her temples. The other officer smiled a firm-jawed, long, crooked smile at her; Harrow was electrified by the fact that beneath the hastily brushed crop of red hair those eyes were—"
(the fact that my playlist started 2 become 1 from the spice girls right now is actually incredibly funny)
AND ABBY GOES "Absolutely not"
ABBY NOOOOOOOOOO
ABBY LET ME HAVE THISSSSSSSS
LET ME HAVE A COFFEE SHOP AU INTERLUDE AS A TREAT
I DESERVE IT
WE ALL DESERVE IT
CHAPTER 43
GIDEON FRACTURED SKULL PEOPLE
AVIATOR GLASSES, CROSSED OUT IX, CRACKED SKULL
one night before the emperor's murder
we're connecting the timelines
ortus's polycule is arguing about the previous scenarios and whether or not "that was..." while harrow wakes up
abby promptly shoos everyone out of the room
FOLKS LISTEN TO THIS NOW
LISTEN TO THISSSSSSS
"If I forget you, let my right hand be forgotten. Add more also, if aught but death part me and thee. Griddle."
I'M IN P A I N
I'M IN S H A M B L E S
(my playlist decided on hoobastank's the reason now lmao what is happening with the 90s/early2000s playlist tonight)
OK OK EXPOSITION TIME
sort of, you know how it is
harrow remembers gideon and cries for her as we all do
abby is asking her questions and gives her one minute to mourn
so, harrowcita decided to do the hair cut brain procedure to separate the part of her brain that remembered and understood gideon's soul
accoding to her, it was "a brute-force solution but it worked"
very gideon behavior, we love that
abby points out that harrow is also very much haunted by an invasive soul
harrow's like ?????????????????????????? on top of everything else?????????
I'm wondering if this is ice cube barbie????? not sure
abby explains that harrow is possessed by an angry spirit and that she's losing against it
ice cube barbie sure has reason to be angry if she wants to, she had to put up with doctor reverend emperor john's bs
also, the canaan au is harrow's form of palmolive's bachelor loft, the bubble in the river thing
she made an au in the river and brought on all her ghostie ghoulie friends to populate it
abby tells her that she didn't remove her memories of gideon, she re-wrote and re-touched them with ortus, which is why he was invited, and she also filled in spaces of some people (people who weren't dead) with constructs
harrow says "what a waste of a woman, to have ended her life at the bottom of a ladder"
RIGHT???? she was killed so book 1 could be longer, otherwise it would have been solved in 2 minutes, no wonder she's the top in the polycule
apparently also a lot of what's happening at this canaan au has been modified by this invasive spirit that's haunting harrow
harrowcita tells abby who's alive, abby says regina george twin should have been the lyctor
NOW WAIT A MINUTE THERE
yandere twin and I don't see eye to eye on everything but I get defensive if someone's trashing her abilities in comparison to her sister
also "The Master Warden found the idea of dying inconvenient"
I love that chad catches a lot of strays when he isn't there but palmolive gets a lot of compliments when he isn't there
did they ever interact one on one btw? I don't remember, it feels like a jock vs nerd situation
wait, are they a ship???
why am I asking this now IT'S NOT THE TIME
harrow starts quoting gideon ♥ "as her—cavalier—might have put it, absolutely butt-fuck nothing happened"
we love that, so poetic
harrowcita basically can't leave her canaan bubble now because she's in the river due to the fight that was going on with the beast and whatnot
abby says that the canaan au happens when harrow is asleep, unconscious or just disconnected from outside stimuli
harrow tells her about the beast and how she was brochetted out there
abby says that she's not dead yet because, if she was, her soul would be gone forever and they need to ensure her body survives
harrow asks herself "what is happening out there?"
WOULDN'T WE LIKE TO KNOW
BUT WE WON'T KNOW YET
because I have immense willpower and knew this was the right time to stop reading, otherwise this recap would be awfully long
gonna put "strong willpower" in my cv to see if the sixth house accepts me
see you in the next one very soon!!! be safe and take care of yourselves ♥
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Well- thanks for the tag. Um... storytelling my life, huh.
Well, you can... officially say I've got one of the most boring and normal life ever.
I always hear or see kids talking about something that happened in their life. Like breaking a bone or two... getting sick really often... heck, my brother got a fish bone stuck in his throat once and my sister had an incident while jumping on a trampoline and her tounge(the tip of it) was dangling, almost falling off
But me? ...I barely got sick when I was younger according to my grandmother. I think I may have sprained my ankle once in my life. But that's all. Nothing worth telling a story about. Especially since I can't remember a bunch of stuff.
Uhhhhh maybe the story of how I got a nose bleed.
I got like... two nose bleeds my entire life. And I remember exactly why. I could have other times that I don't remember but- once in like.. a dojo when I was young to learn jujitsu or taekwondo or something- there was a small fight between the kids and my stupid ass thought it's be a good idea to try and stop them(either that or I just got hit while walking past them lol) so yeah. That's the first one. And second one... it was 2-3 years ago? I stayed up a night. And got a nose bleed. Which was strange. I wasn't even that tired on that day. Nor have I had a nosebleed when I was not sleeping at night. Also another funny(?) thing about this, I stayed up for two days in a row about a week before, and I was fine during that.
If I go through more recent stuff though, there's a little bit more events(because I have become a weird person during the last 3 years). Like two years ago, it was the start of a new school year. We took a bunch of different kind of tests. Similar to personality tests. One of the results... must've been a bit... bad. Cause my mom got a message from the school asking if she wanted to send me to the school therapy(not too big or serious I assume. It's just a school therapy system after all). Of course I reassured her and she didn't think it would be a problem so I didn't go.
Or last year. When I hit a guy on the back of his head. With a book. Either the Mark of Athena or The blood of Olympus :)
it's so weird to me that everyone on this website is a human person outside of their weird internet niche so rb this with a random bit of your lore
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NICHOLAS’ CHAIN
HEADCANONS
pairing: nicholas a. chavez x black!reader
summary: you love when nicholas sports his signature accessory of his chain, but he loves it on you more.
contains: lots of words, sfw, a bit of suggestiveness, some swearing, cute couple stuff, fluff, established relationship, you and nicholas being mushy and obsessed with each other (ya’ll make me sick), texting: reader, nicholas.
taglist: @sabrinasopposite @supaprettyg @gxuxhdjdu @elitesanjisimp @jkr820 @simply-the-best23 @hnch33rios @stereotypicalbarbie @rosiestalez @ellethespaceunicorn @camiesully @zombigrlll
• you loved a lot of things about your boyfriend, nicholas chavez.
• you loved his kindness, charisma, talent, affection, tenderness, and humor.
• let’s not forget that he’s foine. not just fine. foine.
• you really secured the bag with this sexy ass, six foot one cinnamon roll of a man.
• you especially loved his style!
• he definitely suits the casual/basic wear on a daily basis and he cleans up well when it comes to premiers and interviews.
• his closet consists usual t-shirts, jeans, sweatpants, flannels, ball caps, and sneakers.
• your favorite part of his style was his main accessory: his chain necklace.
• your personal favorites are his silver chain and golden cross chain.
• you want to jump his bones whenever he wears one with a dress shirt that’s unbuttoned at the top, a white tank top, or no shirt at all. god, it turns you on.
• both silver and gold compliment his skin tone so perfectly.
• it looks so amazing against his toned shoulders, neck, and chest.
• it hits different when you see him wearing them when you guys workout together.
• you couldn’t exercise like you wanted because you were distracted.
• we must stay focused!
• you’re shorter than him, so you notice that he rotates chains depending on his outfit.
• he has a collection in ya’lls room.
• the chains deserved a special place to be in, so you gift him a new jewelry box for his birthday and he’s so grateful for it.
• he does NOT want to lose any of his necklaces.
• when you cuddle, you always lay on his chest. he loves to watch as your fingers glide against the metal.
• if it’s a chain with a charm, like the cross necklace, you’d like to gently caress it between your index and thumb. you love the sleek, smooth texture.
•when you kiss him, you wrap your arms around his neck, placing your palm on the nape to softly grip the chain to pull him in closer to you.
• or you sometimes place your hands on his chest.
• if he’s bare chested during a heated makeout session, you’d move down to pepper kisses all around that area, and give a final kiss to the charm in the middle before your lips meet to dance with his again.
• bonus when your chest is against his and you feel the slightly cold metal press on your skin.
• just like you steal his hoodies and t-shirts, you sneak one of his necklaces every once in a while.
• one time while nicholas was away filming, you bought a new dress to wear to a premiere that you’re accompanying him to. when you tried it on, it was pretty low cut and exposed a lot of your chest area.
• it was missing something, so to fill in the gap, you put on one of nicholas’ chains. you took a picture of it in your full body mirror and sent it to him.
• • •
bookie, my dress came through! what do you think? ☺️
• • •
absolutely stunning, y/n. 😍
god, you’re so sexy, sweetheart.
i’m gonna be the luckiest guy to have you by my side on the red carpet. 😩
• • •
ty, baby! i’m so glad you like it. i was worried for a minute. notice anything different? 👀
• • •
worried? you know that if you wore a hefty trash bag, i would still love it on you, right? 🫠
…no. did you do something with your hair? i want to make sure i notice that every time.
• • •
no, boy! 😂 bet, i’ll give you a hint. zoom in on my chest.
• • •
i’ve been looking at your chest, baby. 😏
• • •
nick, i’m being deadass, ya nasty.
• • •
okay, hold on. lemme look again.
wait
is that my cross chain?
omfg
you look so damn good! i wish that i could come home to see that in person. 😩🧎🏽
• • •
thank you! 😘
i’ve missed you so much it reminded me of you and idk if i told you this but…
nicholas, every time you wear a necklace, i go crazy. you be looking so good. 😍 i just wanna pull you by it, sometimes when we you know…
i need to stop. you’re at work and i don’t want to mess up your focus!
you’re gonna have to wait until the premiere. i’ll make sure to put it back after i’m done with it too.
• • •
well, fuck.
baby, i want you to keep it. i can always get another.
if i wanted anyone to have it, it’d be you, y/n.
you look so beautiful with it on…especially with that dress.
can’t wait to see it on without the dress.
• after that response, your face and…your body heat up. you put your phone down to take a long, cold shower. damn him.
• you borrowing his chains became a frequent habit.
• he’d always notice and he shows it by giving you the sweetest compliments.
• nicholas would hug you from behind, place his hands on your hips, and pepper kisses on the back and sides of your neck where his chain is.
• it makes your heart flutter everytime.
• ever since you told him about how good his necklace’s looked, nicholas would send you more shirtless or tank top pics, to make sure you see the necklace.
• he loves it when you pull him into a kiss by his necklace.
• his favorite is when you have on the gold cross. he adores the way it compliments your glowing, melanated skin.
• if you wore a low-cut top with the girls being nice and extra supported, he’d love to steal a glimpse or some kisses right at the crevice of your cleavage where the charm perfectly falls in.
• he bought you some his and hers matching chains for your anniversary. you thought that you were gonna burst in tears, you love this man. he’s so cute,it’s not even funny.
• they were on two, long silver chains with open hands at the charm and another circular one each with your first initials on it. the charms were magnetic, so when they came close, they’d immediately pull together as closer as possible symbolizing your love and your loyalty of this blissful relationship you share.
• he’s always checking to make sure you’re wearing your chain.
• the necklaces immediately connect when you kiss him.
• if you got on yours and he wore a different one, he’d immediately swap it out to match with you. no question.
• this, with nicholas alexander chavez, was all that you wanted, all that you needed, and it was all that mattered.
#black reader#black girl#nicholas chavez fic#nicholas chavez fluff#nicholas chavez imagine#nicholas alexander chavez x black reader#nicholas chavez x black reader#quick head canon#sfw#blurb#drabble#nicholas alexander chavez x reader#nicholas chavez#nicholas chavez x reader#nicholas alexander chavez#nicholas chavez x y/n#nicholas chavez x black!reader#x black!fem!reader#x black reader#black!reader#actor x reader#actor x black reader
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I LOVE YOUR VIRGINITY AU 😭😭😭😭 its actually so GOOD i cant wait to see what schlatt has to say when he talks to us (please tell me ur making a part 6😭🙏🙏🙏)
this series is so much fun i have so many ideas and apparently y'all do too so keep em comin i love you all
CW: a lil dubcon-y, choking, v rough
ted makes it out and down the street just in time to see schlatt yank open the door to the main building and let it slam behind him
he winces at the thought of what you're in for now that he's gone, remembering the hickey on your neck only when he crosses the street
schlatt, in the meantime, is barging into your apartment, mumbling a half-hearted apology to your roommate as they nervously grab their stuff and leave you two alone
he heads straight down the hallway to your room and just hovers in the entryway, tossing his bags down by the door like ted did
"charlie?" he starts
"i can explain-"
you try to reason with him but he just strides over to the bed in two large steps and climbs so he's leaning over you, staring down at you with a dark, vacant expression
"of course you're going to explain. you're gonna tell me all about it while i..." his voice trails off as he notices the bruise on the side of your throat
"what the fuck is this?"
he sounds different, like it caught him off guard
"that's not... that's not charlie. his hickeys are older. that looks like it just fucking happened. are you kidding me?"
"schlatt, i told you we aren't exclusive."
"i'm not mad you fucked someone else!!" he exclaims, almost in disbelief
"i'm mad you fucked one of my best friends."
you make a face and he narrows his eyes for a second
"...who gave you that, on your neck?"
unable to meet his gaze, you turn away and try to find the right words
"why are you acting so strange? do i know him?"
"schlatt..."
"what?"
he sets his jaw and gently takes one of your wrists in each of his hands, bringing them to either side of your head and pinning you down
"s-schlatt, listen, i don't want it to cause problems between you two," you stammer
his grip tightens as he realizes the only other person it could be
scanning your face to see if your remorse is genuine, he swallows hard and grins a hollow, hopeless smile
"you fucked ted, didn't you?"
his words paralyze you; the only movement in the room is the rapid rising and falling of your chest
"i'm so sorry," you begin once you can finally talk again
a deep sigh escapes him, and he shakes his head slightly as he looks away
"you fucking whore."
helpless to stop the strangled moan that falls from your lips, you shift uncomfortably on the bed
schlatt moves from his position on your side, leering down at you, to one on top of you, holding you down even more forcefully now
"i should've known. i shouldn't've told them how good you were if i wanted to keep you all to myself. fuck," he mutters, more to himself than anything
"i'm not some toy for you to-"
"shut the fuck up!! right now, you absolutely are a toy. can't believe you're that much of a fucking slut."
"schlatt!!"
"i said shut up!" he snarls
"was he better than me? i know charlie wasn't; there's no shot he fucks good."
he switches to holding both of your wrists in one hand above your head and grips your face with the other, squishing your cheeks and eliciting a small moan from you
"i'm only gonna ask you one more time. was he better than me?"
his voice is cold, and it send chills down your spine
"he was- it was different!! it was just different, schlatt, please, you know i don't like to compare," you babble in an attempt to satiate him
but it's not enough
he lets out a low chuckle and, in a flash, his hand is wrapped around your throat, squeezing tighter and tighter every second
"you're dumber than i thought," he muses, tilting his head as he enjoys the way your eyes roll back into your head, fluttering open and closed rapidly
a frantic, garbled grunt from you convinces him to release you, and he shakes out his hand after he does
he pulls off the clothes you barely managed to put on in time after ted left and wastes no time shoving two fingers into you
when you let out a wail and arch your back, he just shoves you back down by your hips and begins pumping them in and out at a merciless pace (this is for his pleasure, not yours, remember?)
"fuck!!! please, schlatt, stop," you beg
but he doesn't listen
just flicks his eyes up to your face and then shoves his head between your thighs
he's cruel with his tongue, swirling and circling and flicking at your clit endlessly
no amount of screaming his name changes his behavior, he just keeps eating you
occasionally he pulls away to look at the mess he's made of your cunt, sloppy and covered in both your juices and his saliva
he always returns to his feasting after delivering a harsh smack to your pussy
it goes on for almost an hour; your bedsheets are completely ruined by the time he pulls away, chest heaving, and wipes his mouth
you can't even speak, your throat is sore from pleading with him to stop. you gave up after the third orgasm
schlatt doesn't even say anything, just pulls his shirt over his head (giving you flashbacks to ted) and tears his pants and boxers off
you watch wearily as he hikes your legs over his shoulders and shoves himself into you
it would've hurt if you weren't absolutely soaked
immediately, he establishes a brutal pace, and you swear you can feel him brushing your cervix with every thrust
it's slightly painful, but you swear nothing has ever felt so good
he's got you bent nearly in half, watching your expressions as you sob silently from the bliss he's giving you
"bet he didn't feel this good."
he smirks almost imperceptibly when you shake your head vigorously, finally admitting what he wanted to hear
"yeah? bet he couldn't fuck you like i do. bet he wasn't able to reach this- fuck- deep inside you, huh?"
a raspy squeal escapes you, voice breaking from desperation
"got you so fucked out you can't even talk. just layin' there cryin'. do you know how pathetic you are? made your way around the whole friend group. are you fuckin' happy with yourself? you satisfied yet?"
he punctuates each question with a slam deeper into you than the last, gritting his teeth and hanging his head once he finishes speaking
"i'm gonna fucking cum in you. and you're gonna take it. do you understand?" he growls
nodding frantically, your walls clench around him, and he groans and somehow quickens his pace, jackhammering into you so hard and fast that you can't help but scream his name over and over, despite how badly your throat hurts
he's very vocal towards the end, moaning and grunting desperately as he pumps his hips forward a few final times before completely sinking into you as he releases
after a bit, he pulls out and lets your legs drop, noticing how shaky they are and patting one knee softly
"c'mon. i'll help you to the bathroom. but after that we need to actually have a conversation; i'm sorry i lost it like that."
dazed, you nod, and he helps you take a shower
as the hot water streams down the both of you, schlatt holding you up while he washes you off, he presses a kiss to the top of your head
"i don't... i don't want you to think i didn't enjoy sleeping with charlie and ted," you mumble dreamily
he falters for a second but continues cleaning you off
"i like you a lot, schlatt, but i'm into the two of them as well. i want you to be okay with that."
he lets out a deep exhale as he turns off the water, then steps out of the shower and helps you dry off
"i'd have to talk to them. we'll see, i dunno. can we just... spend the rest of the day together and talk about this tomorrow?"
a soft smile appears on your face and you nod, pulling him down to kiss you
"c'mon, help me get to bed. i can barely stand up."
#x reader#jschlatt x reader#schlatt x reader#jschlatt smut#jschlatt x you#schlatt x you#schlatt smut#ted nivison x reader#ted nivison smut#ted nivison x you#charlie slimecicle x reader#charlie slimecicle smut#charlie slimecicle x you#slimecicle x reader#slimecicle smut#slimecicle x you
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any advice for playing a character very different than you IRL? i know it sounds silly, but i play a warlock who would reasonably have good knowledge of magic that i don’t have as a newer player and would be far more eloquent/persuasive than i am on the spot. my dm asks that we speak in character before resorting to rolls which is great but i feel like i get nerfed for not memorizing books of lore/not being a theatre kid with great improv skills.
I think you should talk to your GM about the need to speak in-character because for some people it can actually be an obstacle. Now, I'm very much an advocate for players describing their characters' actions before they roll, like shit like "Can I roll to persuade this guy" is nothing. But there should not be an insistence on a strict need to speak in-character.
So like, as long as everyone else, more or less, knows what your character is doing and saying, I don't see there being anything wrong with your narration being more detached. It's also okay to switch between these two, describing character actions more abstractly one moment and then speaking lines as your character might speak them the other. A strict insistence on having to speak lines in-character all the time seems unfair, provided you describe what your character is doing in terms of actions and intent.
So anyway, assuming Gonad the Barbarian, you could like do something like "Gonad steps towards the guard and says 'What ho, good guardsman, wouldst thou allow me to go and see yon magistrate?'" or you could just say "Gonad steps towards the guard and asks the guard if he may see the magistrate." And then when asked to present an argument you could just say "Gonad says that it's of utmost importance and waves the letter with the viscount's seal in front of the guard." Like, as much as I like putting on a goblin voice and playing out my character's lines, that shit isn't necessary and this more detached form of narration is just as fine.
And finally, it's literally just okay to ask. I sometimes do this still: sometimes I'm stumped for what a cool line would be for someone to say, and this happens to me on both sides of the GM screen, and sometimes it's fun to just defer to the rest of the table like "Hey I know this would be a perfect moment for Morningwood the Elf to say something epic, but I can't figure it out, does anyone else have an idea?" Like, Morningwood the Elf may be my character but he's part of a narrative that everyone is partaking in creating, so like it's always okay to step back and ask everyone for what would be a good and cool thing for your character to say. Especially as a newer player the rest of the group should be okay with letting you ask them for advice on stuff like this without being weird about it.
Also, the folks at @anim-ttrpgs are very passionate about this sort of thing and especially third person narration, and their game Eureka encourages it very heavily. They have a few interesting posts about it on their page which I hope to dig out once I'm no longer tired, but I apparently slept pretty badly last night and am already nodding off when it is barely past nine here
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Okay, so because of the state of the world today, I am going to go into more detail. This is still going to be vague, intentionally so because everyone's situation and needs are different, so I can only say what worked for me, but:
Most audio programs like itunes, mediamonkey, and musicbee have CD ripping capabilities. Some of them are intentionally paywalled. Other programs like Exact Audio Copy or Asunder exist that do nothing but rip CDs, to the highest possible sound quality. If you care about fidelity and don't care about hard drive space, go for FLAC - if you want it to sound perfectly fine but at a quarter of the filesize, go MP3 320. Organize them how you want or have something like Musicbrainz Picard or your itunes/mediamonkey/etc. organize it for you.
MakeMKV rips DVDs and blu-rays into raw files, preserving all audio and text streams (like other languages and subtitles). The filesizes are big. You can use Handbrake to compress them as well as change file format if you need to - mp4s can have subtitles permanently burned in but mkv can leave them as separate choosable streams. I have found good Handbrake settings for myself, they may or may not work for you so do your research. Once again, you can organize them how you like, or if you want to use a personal media server program so's you can stream it to your phones or wifi-connected TVs, you can.
Plex and Emby are personal media server platforms that have paid premium features - you install the server program on a machine and a player app on whatever you want to stream your stuff to. Kodi and Jellyfin are completely free versions of the above. Do your research, see what you need. This is how you can make your own local Netflix with your own shit, including the director's commentaries or DVD special features.
Calibre can organize all your ebooks and digital comics and with some plugin support, strip DRM from them so you can read them on any device you want instead of just the account you bought them from. I will not link guides to them, you can find them on your own.
If you have the money or resources, I would recommend building or buying your own home media server. You can repurpose an old but still-working computer - using a lighter distribution of linux can help extend the life of older hardware but windows also works fine for any of the above. You can also buy or build a NAS (Network Attached Storage) that does nothing but be a home media server, and if one has integrated graphics it can also handle media transcoding.
And don't get rid of your physical media. As other people in the notes have pointed out, CDs and DVDs do degrade physically over decades so you might want to burn new copies of your older stuff every so often, but keep them around in case something happens and you need to rip them all again.
Save your stuff. Especially media from queer and POC voices that are at the most vulnerable to being censored or removed.
Keep seeing the (extremely correct) posts about keeping your stuff on physical media - CDs, DVDs, blu-rays, books, etc.
And yes, 100%, do not get rid of your physical media in favor of streaming. I did some of that about a decade or so ago before I learned better and there are books and CDs I now need to find again.
But something that I see a lot of people dismiss is that the digital versions are more convenient. Taking ebooks to travel is so much better than taking up half your backpack, having digital music is genuinely better than swapping out discs
The thing is, it's not mutually exclusive. Rip your CDs and DVDs but keep the discs - you can toss the cases in favor of more condensed storage and leave them in your closet until you need them again. Strip the DRM from your ebooks - you paid for them the same way you'd have paid for physical paper tree-based versions - and burn them to CDs as well for safekeeping.
You can play MP3s just as easily as Spotify in cars and in much the same way, and you can stream movie files from your computer to your TV just as easily. Tech can be both convenient and for personal preservation - you can do both.
Keep your physical stuff because streamers can just get rid of anything at any time, but you absolutely can keep the convenience of the modern digital era at the same time.
I spent several months last year digitizing the roughly 1200 discs that we've accumulated for the past thirtyish years - music, movies, TV - and it was not only the most fun project I took on, it's been the most rewarding because we have movies that aren't available to stream. But I can stream it to my TV with director's commentary any time I want.
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